Last year marked a turning point in the world of LGBT politics; one that sparkles. Self-proclaimed activists across the country have taken their message of...well, I'm not quite sure what their message is supposed to be, but they've been dumping it all over whomever crosses their path.
For those of you not in the know, I speak of Glitter Bombing - the new LGBT protest movement whereby unsuspecting recipients are showered with glitter, while activists shout various supposedly-pro-LGBT slogans at them. It's a far cry from the Anita Bryant fruit pie incident, but when you take into account the fact that such an act of outright aggression, today, would likely land your ass in jail for assault and battery, I suppose this is the next logical step.
Wait......
Strike that. It's actually pretty stupid.
The first two recipients of this wayward form of protest were serial adulterer, Newt Gingrich, and his second mistress/third wife, Calista. During a book signing tour in May of 2011, a seemingly random activist threw a load of glitter on the surprisingly sedate former Speaker and his Aryan 3rd Reich...I mean wife...after which he screamed, "Stop the hate!" while being dragged from the room by security.
If this seems silly, that's because it is.
Calista goes on to say, "Well, that's a first." Little did she know how prophetic her words would prove.
Since the initial incident, various other conservatives have been on the receiving end of this ridiculous practice, including Tim Pawlenty, Michele Bachmann, Marcus Bachmann's ex-gay therapy clinic (by a gay barbarian horde, no less), the Minnesota for Marriage booth at the Minnesota State Fair, Karl Rove, and Rick Santorum. All of these people are worthy of protest, and as far as creativity goes, I suppose a trip to Michael's or Party City beats handcuffing oneself to them and having to actually spend any amount of time in close proximity to them. Heck, even Sue Sylvester got the glitter treatment on an episode of Glee, this season.
The idea behind Glitter Bombing is that the substance being thrown on someone is virtually harmless, and is unlikely to result in any action being taken, other than being forcibly removed from the site. The protestor(s) can surprise the victim, shout their peace, and be dragged out of the room without facing any serious litigation.
Oh, and they get to claim bragging rights. For what, I'm not sure. It's not like they're burning themselves in effigy like Tibetan monks, burning their bras, or burning their draft cards. (Boy...looking back, there seems to be a lot of fire involved in protests.)
All was well and good until one of our own fell victim to the spontaneous sparkly cloudburst of dumb. Dan Savage, perennial gay rights activist and relationship columnist, was glitter bombed in November in Oregon and again in California for his alleged "transphobia." Why? Because he dared to mention the third rail of LGBT politics; the six-letter word guaranteed to send every hypersensitive person within hearing range into paroxysms of misdirected rage - "tranny."
Never mind the fact that he was actually repeating someone's question to them, at the time, during a Q&A session. Never mind the fact that someone had come to the event with the glitter easily accessible should he say something that might offend any idiot bound and determined to take offense at every turn.
Since this ill-conceived attack, trans activists, who are seemingly unwilling or unable to get their own damn movement, have worked themselves into a tizzy, attempting to rebrand Dan Savage as a transphobe; part of the (and I quote) "...broader [group] of gay, white, cis-gendered, able-bodied gay men focused on gay-marriage priorities."
Just so we're real clear, here, this is Dan Savage - the man who single-handedly redefined, literally, for the entire world the word "Santorum;" the man who has gone to bat for the LGBT community more times than any of the Shower Shot Socialites over at the Human Rights Campaign; who started a massively popular semi-anti-bullying campaign to tell kids that "It Gets Better," which has caught on like a wildfire in the L.A. hillsides. This is our new LGBT Public Enemy Number One?
What the hell?
What started as a silly, albeit unique, form of protest against the actual enemies of equality in this country is quickly turning into a farce. To be fair, it made the protesters look pretty stupid to begin with; clearly these people did not learn the lessons from PETA after they soaked people wearing fur in red paint. Little else makes a person less likable than watching them douse someone in any substance without their permission.
This trend has got to end, and soon. No good can come of acting the Fool every time one gets their panties in a twist over something as inconsequential as using the dreaded T-Word. It is one thing to protest people who are committing actual harm in our society, whether in terms of legislative measures or debunked aversion therapy. Hell, I'd go so far as to suggest glitter bombing every HRC event in protest of the amount of money they siphon out of our pockets versus the amount of actual work they do and progress they (and not other organizations for whose work they so readily take credit) actually accomplish. It is, however, an entirely different matter to make enemies out of our greatest allies and defenders.
What's next? Are we going to glitter bomb David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs? Perhaps we should hit Kathy Griffin...God knows she's pissed off enough people. Rosie? Whoopie? Roseanne?
We need a better tactic...and we need it fast.
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