Some of My Best Friends Have Abortions

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This one is likely to be a shorter blog than I'm used to penning, largely because I just don't have the patience, right now, to go into extreme detail when it comes to my opinion on this subject.  Suffice it to say that I find myself annoyed, not just with the Talibangelicals and TeaTards who see fit to exact their religious standards on America's governance, but also with the gay male community who largely sit silent about issues involving women, bisexual, and transexual citizens.

When I lived in Los Angeles, I was surrounded by a cadre of friends, most of whom were gay men largely over the age of 40.  I've always felt more comfortable with people older than myself, likely as a result of spending so much time around adults and older teenagers throughout most of my childhood.  I rarely had friends my own age - I often found their childish antics far too exhausting for my more erudite tastes (yes, I'm being facetious).

One of the things that horrified me, however, about dinner conversations and group gatherings with my friends in L.A. was the terrifying lack of empathy displayed for people other than themselves when it came to rights.  It wasn't so much that they actively opposed rights for other groups (though that would come, later); what disturbed me, rather, was the total absence of concern for the rights of others, or how the loss of those rights have an indirect effect on our own.

Over a very nice Italian dinner, one friend said to me, "I honestly don't care about the Lesbian Community.  Let them fight their own battles."

At first, I thought he was kidding, and I laughed out loud, only to be faced with stone-faced sincerity.

"No, really.  I've spent several years working for the city of West Hollywood, and I am just tired of having to fight for their rights.  They can just start taking care of themselves!"

I've discovered that, at times like this, I am often torn between literally or verbally eviscerating the person sitting opposite me.  Most times, however, I simply choose a short retort, more concerned with repeating the story at a later date, though I never reveal their names, because such open expression of idiotic views is likely to get them booted out of a job working for a city government.

I wish I could say that this type of behavior is isolated, but in large part, it's not.

Don't get me wrong - I find myself exhausted by the neverending addition of letters to the LGBT acronym.  Every other year, it seems like we need to start recognizing a different group of people under our tent.  What was once simply the 'LGB Community,' quickly added the 'T,' which really isn't so much a sexual orientation as it is a gender orientation.  Shortly thereafter followed the 'Q,' which by some accounts means 'Queer,' again, is more related to gender identity than sexual attraction, and by others, 'Questioning,' which really is a bit broad.  And then, we added the 'I,' for 'Intersexed,' and the 'A' for 'Asexual,' only one of which describes a sexual proclivity.

Whenever I hear people start nattering on about LGBTQIA, I, too, feel frustrated that we have too keep inviting people into the fold.  Why can't they fight their own battles?  What does my fight for equality have to do with whether or not they can't use a certain bathroom?

I then take a step back from my frustration, breathe deeply, and remember how we got to where we are, today.  If not for a drag queen fighting back, the Stonewall Riots would not have occurred - the event on Christopher Street that started the Pride movement's national recognition as a "thing," and it was all because a drag queen got pissed off and fought back.

It's important to remember that whenever we talk about cutting a group lose and letting them fight their own fight.  When we make statements like, "'Gay' is the new 'Black,'" a statement with which I am apt to agree, what we are actually saying, though it may offend the sensibilities of some, is that we are all tied together.  We're not fighting for special rights; we're fighting for equal rights.

THIS is why I write about issues involving abortion, lesbian safe spaces, and why religion is destroying our nation - because everyone's rights are inextricably linked.  Some of my best friends have had abortions, and each of them - each and every one of them - feel, today, that they made not only the right decision, but the best decision available to them.  They stand up for my rights, and I will gladly stand for theirs.

Will we offend one another's sensibilities from time to time?  Certainly.  But, I will always be there to fight for their rights, regardless of whether or not their issues directly affect me, because I'm not a selfish cunt.